And other stuff. Look at this shit.
I made some auxiliary snacks out of leftover stuff. I made these to impress that girl I like. Also insert some long preamble about how me mum used to make crispth rice squares just so and I still make them like that. Actually this one time I added too much marshmallow creme to my cripth rice squares and I liked it, so I kept doing it. Let’s make ’em. r u red e?
So the crisp rice squares were uh;
- Cripth rice: 120g (it’s more fun to say cripth rice, I’ll do that from now on)
- Cookie Crisp: 60g
- Marhsmallow creme: 100g
- Butter: 45g
- Vanilla Extract: I dunno man a bit I just sort of splashed some in there, haha.
Before anything, set up a sheet pan or baking sheet. I use a half sheet size pan. I don’t know what size that is centimetres. It’s half the size of a sheet pan. The internet tells me 45x33cm. Set up some parchment or wax paper on it, greasing the paper isn’t a bad idea. Also, grease up a rolling pin, the handles too. Uhm, don’t do that. Just uh, grease up the rolling pin bit.
So like to make the cripth rice squares, people say you gotta melt the cream and butter on “low” heat, I don’t do that. You need it like 2/3rds the way to medium. Melt the butter first, the glorp in the creme. I used a big pan with a lid and just stirred while I measured out the cripth rice and uh, cookie crisp. With the marshmallow cream and butter, you really want to make sure it’s all congealed, and that it’s a solid mass. Once it’s there, drizzle in the vanilla extract, then mix thoroughly.
Combine with cereal mixture and work fast, ’cause this shit cools fast. This is why we set up the pan first. Try to spread it out in a line across the middle, and working from the middle out, flatten it with your rolling pin. Don’t feel bad about the corner pieces being thin, that’s likely to happen. There will be some casualties you can eat later. Into the fridge it goes to cool.
So now we make cookies.
- Flour: 340g
- Salt: 6g
- Baking Soda: 5g
- Corn starch: 7g
- Butter: 225g
- Brown Sugar: 225g
- White sugar: 56g
- Egg: One and one yolk.
- Vanilla extract: 7g
- Dark chocolate chips: 340g
This will make extras and that’s okay. They’re fucking delicious. Combine the dry mixture in whatever order you like, but for the wet, melt the butter, then cool it to the point it can still be easily stirred, but is no longer runny. Like it looks solid in the fridge, but is still very malleable. While it’s cooling, mix together the white and brown sugar, and put your eggs in some room temperature water so they climatize. Is that a word? I dunno, man. Anyway, combine the butter and sugars, then add in the eggs, then slowly add in the the dry mixture, once combined, add the chocolate chips. Let it cool in the fridge for about an hour, then bake 20g pieces for 12m at 170c. Your mileage may very. I did two test batches, the first one to figure out weight, and the second one to figure out cooking time. Every oven is different. Do a test batch.
But before we bake it, let’s wait for the cookie dough to cool. Grab your square cutter and cut the cripth rice into squares. Once you’ve gotten it all cut into squares, put it in the freezer and if you have a chocolate melter, start melting the milk chocolate we’re going to put on top. If not, use a double boiler, if not, put a sautee pan on top of a pot filled about a third the way with water. Bring the water to a boil, then turn the stovetop down to the point where it’s just before a boil. It took about 300g of milk chocolate, and 30g of shortening. If using a chocolate melter, let it heat up (if you have a cheap one, wrap it in a bunch of towels to help hold in heat), toss in your milk chocolate, melt the shortening, then pour it over and stir intermittently. For a double boiler, melt the shortening first, then add the chocolate. Stir as needed till it’s nice and runny.
Anyway, keep baking your cookies, prepping your chocolate, and don’t forget to take the cripth rice square out of the freezer and core out the middle with your round cutter, then back into the freezer. We’re getting them cold so they can hold their shape when we cut them, and put the cookies in.
Let all your cookies cool, then cut them into circles using the same round cutter you used for coring, this will leave you with a lot of cookie edges. I suggest adding them to vanilla ice cream.
Once you’ve cored the right number of cookies, take your cripth rice squares out the freezer, and drop in the cookies. Is your chocolate all melty and gooey? Drizzle over the top using your preferred method. I have a chocolate funnel, it’s awesome, but before I had that I used a spoon. Like, a table spoon.
I did the round of cripth rice squares in chocolate first, then dropped on the macadamia nuts. After which, into the fridge.
You don’t have to add the white chocolate drizzle, but I did. It looks fancy, but all I really did was prep some white chocolate dressing, 150g white chocolate, 15g of shortening, then when it all melty, I dipped a silicone barbecue brush in the chocolate, and shook it over the cookies.
Into the fridge again to settle the white chocolate, and then you can eat them. Yum.
It took me seven hours to do this, though only about four hours of it was actual work. But I mean, look!